Reflections in the Dark

I have spent the holiday break away from family, alone in a large house with no urgent tasks to be completed. All of these factors come together to create a deep and somewhat dark thinking mood, especially for one already predisposed to chapters of brooding. Not all darkness is bad, but when plunging into the depths of thought it can be easy to lose the way. So in a night of careful consideration and deliberation I penned these words to remind me of the story I belong to. Each time I readdress it, I see some nuance in a whole new light. There is nothing altered in the story, only my perception of it. It is simple and unchanging. That is why my hope is so firmly fixed upon it. 


Darkness was all that there was. No space, no time, no pain, no beauty. Void. Then He spoke. There was light and life and purpose. There was work to be done and songs to be sung. He made a son, He fashioned a daughter. He from earth and her from bone. They were His and His alone. Such delight, such beauty, such harmony and peace. 
     Then came the Deceiver with gall in his designs and asps under his tongue. "You will not die," was his emphatic statement. He adjured them for the sake of their greater good. O foolish ones! Led astray by errant words. Foolish one I am to follow your paths to the dead. If only, if only you would have seen there was no greater Good than the one you walked and talked with. Where was the Good when His children forsook Him? He was there. What depth of pain He must have felt. I only ever consider my own sad plight that started on that day. But for Him it was the beginning of the path to the cross. Despite the Deceiver's assurances, die they did. The first children of the Creator were the last to taste of the tree of life. On that day the disappointed Father had animals slain to cover his wayward children's shame. But promised them that through their offspring a redeemer would grow. 
     After many years the promised One came at last. Since man must die to satisfy His Highness' wrath, as a man He came. He said His kingdom was near, but they did not understand. Revolt they called out for. "Death to the oppressor!" But the real oppressor was Death himself and the Lamb King came to slay him. By His limitless power He vanquished the foe men thought was eternal by surrendering Himself to its vile game. 
     Having taken on the punishment of our sin, from the first to the last, His Father raised Him from the dead so that He might be the firstborn of everything. He appeared to many. Then He ascended on high. He is there now interceding for His flock. We await the return He has promised. He will come and restore, and much more than that, He will recreate. A new heaven and a new earth. A home for all the ages to come. A hearth for His faithful ones to warm their weary souls. We shall see our King in all His glory. Perfect fellowship with the Divine awaits all who believe and cry out to Him. Call to Him without delay. Let Him take the burden you cannot carry. 


In the dark of night, when you find yourself alone. Tell yourself this story to stay on the narrow road. 

Bow Your Head & Close Your Eyes

Bow your head and close your eyes. 

We're talking to God so be real quiet

Pray old gra'ma never dies

Lord, please bless our greedy diet

Bow your head and close your eyes

Be sure to ask for His traveling mercies

Eloquent enough to win a Pulitzer Prize

Go long, He doesn't listen to the one who hurries

Say God, Father, Lord, Jesus Christ

Because if you fail to keep readdressing

The One above will not be enticed

And we'll never get His precious blessing

Avoid bringing up the poor outcast

The Holy One doesn't need to be reminded

That compared to us their just outclassed

In their case we have already presided

Why, Oh Bride, is this the sad case

Of our prayers and public petitions

They need not be bordered in lace

Nor practiced with rote repetitions

Pour out your heart, let that be enough

Honest and simple and utterly sincere

Don't be worried if it comes out gruff

But take time to consider what you hold dear

Is it your neighbors or your enemies

That you get on your knees and plead for

Or do you not waste such charities 

And simply ask for more and more

The World is lost, and we're all broken

There's no time to waste before the throne

What important things have we left unspoken

Cry out to God, more than a tedious drone

Bow your head and close your eyes

Perhaps the problem is in the command

We look away from the world as it dies

And lock ourselves in our castle so grand

Death Bride

My bride is as death to me

Affording visions my eyes to see

Not in morbid words speak I

But similitude beneath them lie

For death alone stands between

Me and my Saviour, pure, pristine      

So when into her eyes I gaze

I'll see his brilliance, therein, ablaze

                                                  

‘Er foundations of the world were laid                            

My lovely bride He'd thought and made

To ease the burden of my work made long

He picked her special from amidst the throng

To teach my children, to temper my pride

God gave her to me, my lovely white bride

Of all the reasons He has sent her to earth

There is none better, no more deserving of mirth

Than to act as a window, to be a reflection

Of Christ's death and grand resurrection 

When life is fraught for lack of rain

When life is stressed and pulled by strain

My heart is stilled by her warm embrace

My soul hushed by her glowing face

There is no doubt she's sent from above

To exhibit grace, to show me love

Though I'm a wretched, undeserving man

The Father brought us together in His perfect plan

Her smile my very heart doth smite

Her golden laugh dispels the darkest night

I know not why He has blessed me so 

But everyday, more thankful I grow

In her beauty she will be as death

In her grace, God's very breath

Though hope of this world leaks through sieves 

By her life I know my Jesus lives

My bride is as death to me

Affording visions my eyes to see

Not in morbid words speak I

But similitude beneath them lie

For death alone stands between

Me and my Saviour, as yet unseen

So when into her eyes I gaze

I'll see his brilliance, therein, ablaze

I wrote this poem a long time ago. It has confusing tenses. 

The Diner

I pull into the diner and turn the keys back

Hunch over the wheel and breathe a deep sigh

The place is decked in silver and red

An ode to an era that has long passed by

"Please wait to be seated" the sign reads

Armed with a menu she guides me to a booth

She's older than I, but still quite young

She fakes a smile without showing a tooth

I should have coffee in a place like this

But I've never liked it so why start now?

There's only two others in the whole place

But I hardly take notice as I furrow my brow

Life's not any different than it was yesterday

So why am I trapped in a melancholy mood?

This place seems to mirror my exact feelings

As if in the leaves of my loneliness it was brewed

The women of the shift move unceasingly

Nothing is accomplished in their plenteous work

Their constant chittering babble only adds

To the depth of the interminable murk

This restaurant stands for a time past

Before sexual revolutions and various movements

But really, that time was no different

I still would have yearned for vast self-improvements

I cannot find myself sitting in this booth

Nor can I find myself feeding the poor

But, I think, I must wait 'til the celestial city

After passing through Death's dark door

Then, there, standing next to the Savior

Will be the man I've always wished to be

This world is too broken and this flesh

O! this flesh how it weighs upon me

But He's given me this part to play

Twisted as I am by evil desire

I will tell others the Story of Truth

Subtle or loud as an old town crier

My meal consumed with much indifference

I have spent the time deep in this thought

I have had my arrangement askew

Straying too far I've become overwrought

Before it was Savior, but… loneliness

Now it reads Savior, Lord of the Heavenly Host

Jesus is mine, I call Him by name

By His work I'm indwelled with the Holy Ghost

Relief, relief. But I'd done it again

Worked myself up and begun to doubt

When it starts with me it will go south

And I always question what God's about

I get up from the booth and pay the bill

Slowly stroll back to the awaiting car

Burger and fries is what I paid for

What I got is worth more than a Hollywood star

I turn the keys over and pull out of the diner

Hunch over the wheel and breathe a deep sigh

I'm glad to have such a wonderful Savior

One who's promised never to pass me by

Unnamed Guilt

I'm lying upon the familiar bed

A life's worth of thoughts besieging my head

Pain rooted deep in my heart

The blackness has enveloped body and mind

Shapes impossible to distinguish kind from kind

I'm confused as to my role or part

Reflecting on the day I could have done better

Accomplished more, held the law to the letter

Now I see pride has had its way

For it's not in my ability to attain perfection

Now I hear an old, old voice in the softest inflection

"Listen, once again, to what I have to say."

"It's not you, my son, who carries the world

Where is this 'drain' down which you've swirled?

You're becoming a man just as planned"

"Don't worry about who you were before

I love you completely, do you need any more?

No one can pry you from my hand"

So there in the black, surrounded by gloom

Where a minute before was all encompassing doom

I lay my head on the Savior's breast

Grace is a thing not readily understood

For I'd try to earn His love, if ever I could

But by His wounds I have eternal rest

Waterfalls frozen by half

An icy stare, an endless glare

I meet full in the face

A snowy pass, and sheets like glass

Have led me to this place

My snowshoes, and my deep bruise

Are all that I have packed

And preparation, for this veneration

Are all that I have lacked

A taciturn mood, a thoughtful brood

Happen when I reflect

On frozen walls, of mighty falls

In her beauty decked

There is a measure, a hidden treasure

Beneath her constant thunder

What histories, and deep mysteries

From her I could plunder

The air is frozen, but if chosen

I would forever stay

To watch the light, for sheer delight

In her mistings play

There is a nook, where we can look

At she who's ever speaking

Sit awhile, let out that smile

Which through your lips is peeking

All frustration, and consternation

Are churned up in her pool

And this sensation, by gradation

leaves my troubled mind cool

The wind whips, as my heart sips

From her grace filled song

And out of all, by nature's call

My soul does here belong

Alaska's Wild Proffer

There is a place that beckons me by name
Far past crowded cities with houses all the same

It lies a thousand thousand miles from where I now stand
Far past shops and traffic and all that's dull and bland

Here all that surround me are myriad nameless faces
There all that's offered are wide and pleasant places

"There" always "there" and never "here"
My heart's desire's never been so clear

To leave all man's world has to offer
and heed Alaska's wild proffer

In the south where people live man always looks at cost
It's the type of clothes, the make of car that judges who gets bossed

But far above in the expanse covered in frost
There is a place where a man can just get lost

The land is named Alaska and my heart calls it best
In location and character it is far above the rest

How my heart longs to feel the freedom of its cold embrace
How my eyes burn to see the mountains of that frigid place

There is none like it on all God's grand earth
For it was there that beauty had her birth

"There" always "there" and never "here"
My heart's desire has never been so clear

To leave all man's world has to offer
And heed Alaska's wild proffer

Of laying down the task of putting on a face
And let my heart be moved by its unfettered grace

Oh Alaska where the stars shine bright and clear
Oh the Great Land where adventure's ever near

To enjoy the beauty of that natural state
One must enter with a fresh cleaned slate

And if perhaps one cannot break from worry, doubt and care
His mind will be renewed with just one breath of its crisp air

Alaska gives a man's thoughts room to wander
Its regal beauty gives a his heart a thing to ponder

There one may sit and listen to the loon's mournful song
Or take to the river and and fish the whole day long

"There" always "there" and never "here"
My heart's desire's never been so clear

To leave all man's world has to offer
And heed Alaska's wild proffer